14: Coming Through Crisis Without Shame with Faydra Koenig

Having endured a childhood of abuse at the hands of her step-father, a first marriage failing due to mental illness, and a second marriage that ended with an affair, Faydra Koenig really thought she had been through her deepest trials. By the time she turned 45, she thought she had learned the tough lessons of life, and she used her personal experience in her career in social work and mental health. She became known as “America’s Divorce Coach” and helped others weather those storms.

In 2008, she met a man and fell in love. Their families got along well and they eventually got married. Even at that time, Faydra had no clue about the battles she was going to face. By the time 2012 rolled around, Faydra’s new husband was facing charges for crimes he committed long before she even knew him. He was convicted and sentenced to prison. Thus began Faydra’s journey into depression, loneliness, and shame. She was on the path to learning lessons that would forever change her. Listen to this inspiring interview and be amazed God led Faydra through the storms.

What you’ll hear in this episode:

  • Faydra’s 23 years in mental health, social work, and family court services
  • Empty nest today—wedding planning with her daughter!
  • Favorite verse: Proverbs 3:5-6—“Lean on, trust in, and be confident in your Lord with all of your heart and mind. Do not rely on your own insight or understanding.”
  • A tough background: Sexual, verbal, and physical abuse from age 3-13
  • A new, groundbreaking walk!
  • Faydra’s “late-in-life” salvation at age 41
  • Being infused with everything I need to know about walking with Jesus
  • Working with families and teens with mental health issues
  • Overcoming failed marriages
  • Faydra’s “Lego Moment,” when life snapped together
  • What it means to “own YOUR crap”
  • How to be set free from circumstances
  • Of the Seven Mountains, Faydra stands firm on the mountain of Religion
  • Her husband’s unique experiences in losing EVERYTHING
  • A marriage in jail!
  • For Faydra, there were immediate changes at salvation
  • Changes in entertainment choices
  • The “Garbage Story” of obedience
  • Relationship, not religion
  • What God is doing in ME
  • How Faydra can help others in pain because she’s “been there too”
  • Biggest strength? “To meet people where they are and to make them feel heard.”
  • Biggest weakness? “I can become defensive if judgment or unbelief creeps in.”
  • What God is currently stirring in Faydra: “Trust—especially in the area of economics.”
  • What it means to walk in truth and purpose
  • How does Faydra share the gospel? “By hosting my podcast and letting people speak and share their truth.”
  • A daily habit that contributes to a walk with Jesus? “Spending a lot of time alone, listening to podcasts that are faith-based and intense, and studying God’s Word for myself.”
  • A favorite book? God of the Underdogs by Matt Keller
  • A favorite resource? Podcasts
  • Her advice to the younger Faydra? “I would go to age 31 and say that God is real. The tug you feel and witness in others is real. Even if you don’t have a husband or role models, He is still there.”
  • Faydra’s parting advice: “Stop fighting it. Trust that it’s worth it. Get the stubbornness out and walk toward what God asks of you. Things will be so much better so much faster.”


Coming Out of the Fire podcast

Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin

God of the Underdogs by Matt Keller

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